them sparkles

I spent my 35th birthday in the hospital. I'm currently writing this little post from my hospital bed, one week after being admitted. It's been a really rough year. As of right now, they're not sure what is happening with me. I came in severely dehydrated with incredibly low blood pressure. I thought it was from the harsh antibiotics I was on to treat the pneumonia I developed after leaving the hospital the last time. But even with fluids and different treatments, there's still things the doctors can't explain. I feel like a pin cushion at this point, I've been poked more times this week than it feels like I have in my life. My veins have gone into hiding and so any 'routine' procedure is anything but. Through all of this, the nurses that have been attending to me have been the most warm and compassionate people. Yes, they're here to do a job but they don't have to make you feel like they actually care about you. These ones do and I appreciate ...

Taking care of yourself is one of the best things you can do for you. In doing so, you will also be better to those who matter to you. I recently learned this the hard way. While I thought I was taking care of myself and listening to my body, I wasn't listening hard enough. I was letting my frustration and anxiety build up, thinking if I just pushed it aside, it would eventually just go away. It didn't. As a result, I actually ended being up off work for 7 weeks and in the hospital for one of those. My lupus had begun to flare up and it manifested symptoms I hadn't experienced before. Some so painful and/or uncomfortable, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Eventually, I developed a couple of blood clots, (pulmonary embolisms) in my lungs which, I'm told, has the possibility of being fatal. I've never been in the hospital before, other than to visit people. It was probably the scariest experience of my life. Through all of this, I got to see just how much people ...