Farewell, 2018. Hello, 2019!

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Dear 2018,

I'll get straight to the point. I'm breaking up with you. It's not me, it's definitely you. 

When you came into my life, I had high hopes for us. There were fireworks. There was celebration. You came in with a bang. Things were great in the beginning. You were so shiny, new, and exciting. However, as time went on, you suddenly changed. You became incredibly difficult. For whatever reason, you didn't want to be kind anymore. Even through all of our troubles, I tried to remain hopeful, tried to give you the benefit of the doubt but you still kept trying to break me down. You almost had me at one point but I refused to give in. I decided that I wasn't going to let you crush my spirit any longer. 

With the help of some really amazing people — family, friends, and doctors — we made a plan. A plan to help me escape your angry clutches. A plan to help me rise from where you had knocked me down. Slowly but surely, I started to distance myself from you. I had to break away from you to save myself. 

I can't say it was all bad. Some good did come from our time together. I learned how to stand on my own again (a couple of times!). I may be weaker in body because of you but I am certainly stronger in spirit. Because of you, I know how to take better care of myself. I am now able to place more value on things that are important to me and less on things that don't serve a beneficial purpose. I also learned who, in my life, actually sees value within me and have been able to give less energy to the people who don't. 

You did give me a few other things to be grateful for:
° I spent another year with someone who takes the best care of me, who loves me through all of my rough patches and who will go to great lengths to make sure I am happy. 
° My brother got engaged and I gained a sister (more officially), someone who feels like she's always been part of the family. 
° I was able to call my Nana on her 90th birthday. I am SO thankful I still have her in my life and am able to hear her sweet voice.
° My family and friends are healthy. 
° I work for a company that has been amazingly patient and supportive through all of this. 

As much as it pains me to say this, I want to thank you for helping me grow. The growing pains were excruciating at times but I'm a better, stronger and braver person because of them. I'm more sure now of who I am and who I'll continue to be. 

2018, I wish you nothing but the best but you are now my past. My future, who is bright and beautiful, is waiting just around the corner to whisk me away. 


Dear 2019,

Let's sparkle! ❤️




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